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Did the earth move?

Posted by Richard on July 20, 2006

Today was World Jump Day. At 11:39:13 GMT, 600,248,012 people supposedly all jumped simultaneously. The purpose was to solve the global warming problem by changing the earth’s orbit:

Hans Peter Niesward, from the Department of Gravitationsphysik at the ISA in Munich, says we can stop global warming in one fell swoop — or, more accurately, in one big jump.

The slightly disheveled professor states his case on, an Internet site created to recruit 600,000,000 people to jump simultaneously on July 20 at 11:39:13 GMT in an effort to shift Earth’s position.

Niesward claims that on this day "Earth occupies one of the most fragile positions in its orbits for the last 100 years." According to the site, the shift in orbit will "stop global warming, extend daytime hours and create a more homogeneous climate."

It’s hard to tell, reading the ABC News story quoted above, who’s in on the joke and who isn’t. For instance, according to reporter Alexandra Leo, there was organized opposition. Apparently, they weren’t in on the joke:

Members of the online environmental site have been debating not only the physical possibility of the jump’s promise but the morality of its outcome.

Some believe it’s risky to alter Earth’s orbit, while others fear the jump will make the Gregorian calendar obsolete because of the length of Earth’s new orbit. Others doubt the ability of the world’s population to synchronize an event like this.

The folks at have constructed an anti-World Jump Day manifesto, complete with equations drawn up to dispute the validity of Niesward’s — or Lauschmann’s — theories.

If you visit the World Jump Day site, you can buy commemorative T-shirts (but does doing that mean you’re in on the joke or you’re not?) and upload your jump pictures or videos. The organizers say they’re "calculating the results," and promise to report back soon.

Before you depart the site, learn more about the organizers by clicking the little Lambda Omega Lambda (LOL) button — then you’ll be in on the joke. I think. 🙂

If that didn’t do it — and you have broadband — and you want to watch Michell Malkin jumping on a trampoline… hey, where’d everybody go?

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4 Responses to “Did the earth move?”

  1. beepbeepitsme said

    “Science commits suicide when it adopts a creed.” Thomas Henry Huxley

    Having said this, who stands to benefit from adopting a creed concerning global climate change?

    Who stands to benefit economically and politically by muddying the scientific pond?

    My advice on all things >> “Follow the money.”

    The fossil fuel industries stand to lose billions of dollars.

    They benefit economically and politically by muddying the scientific pond.

  2. Anonymous said

    Well, I’m reluctant to tarnish such wonderful silliness as World Jump Day with serious discussion, but…

    The proponents of the human-induced climate change theory benefit economically (look at the astronomical increase in the number of grants, employment opportunities, etc.) and politically (they further their ideological goal of increasing the scope and size of government, heightening control of the economy, and enhancing the power of and demand for technocrats such as themselves).

    Isn’t it odd that many of the same people warning us about global warming were, in the 1980s, warning us about the coming ice age? By some strange coincidence, their “solution” in both cases revolved around a massive expansion of government control over the economy — and, of course, the hiring of many more experts such as themselves.

  3. Anonymous said

    I know that business rejects global climate change out of hand because it would impact severely on the fossil fuels industry, but that is what makes it the side with the creed.

    It becomes a case of the 11th commandment >>”thou shalt take no notice of anything which may limit my god given right to make as much money as I can regardless of the possible negative impact.”

    Business rarely wants to be held accountable or responsible because the 12th commandment is > “thou shalt not criticise business as it is sacrosanct and blessed by god.”

    I am sorry, I don’t see business as the untouchable force for good in the world, nor do I see it as the force for evil. But I do know that it is ALWAYS loath to accept criticism of its practices and business practises do NOT change unless there IS criticism.

  4. Anonymous said

    Sorry, I can’t take seriously someone who personifies “business” as if it were a single consciousness that has creeds, commandments, wants, etc.

    I should have gone with my first instinct — there’s just no point in attempting a serious discussion with you. Enjoy your Kool-Aid.

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